I mentioned in a previous post how much I detest the Christmas holiday, but I know that’s not true for many people. Christmas is a special time for those who are religious and for many who have children, too, and it can be a time to give a gift to someone who can’t afford the item or who would not otherwise have a gift at all. But generally speaking, among the middle-class folks I know, none of us need more “stuff.” Excess “stuff” is filling our garbage dumps and destroying our planet.
So, I really don’t like to give an unwanted item just for the sake of giving a gift, and I really don’t appreciate receiving those, either. What am I supposed to do with the perfume I’m allergic to, or the scarf I will never wear? Yes, there’s always re-gifting to someone else, but we have to be careful about passing it on or we might hurt the feelings of the person who originally gave the gift.
When I think about gatherings of family or friends, I have no great memories of gifts I received. Do you? My best memories are all of activities and laughter we shared. I hope that folks who gather for the holidays will do something fun together. My first choice would always be to get outside and go for a walk or snowshoe or build a snow woman a snow dinosaur or something physically active, out in nature.
However, I realize that not everyone is capable of rigorous outdoor activity, and often the December weather is not welcoming, either. So maybe, play a simple game that everyone can participate in, like charades. Or have a gift exchange where each person wraps one useful and inexpensive item, like a screwdriver or a soup mix or a set of cooking spoons, then draw from a central pool of wrapped gifts, and let each person keep their gift or trade for another gift that has already been opened (a white elephant gift exchange). That activity can be interactive, often hilarious, and everyone goes home with something that is at least useful.
If you must give a gift to everyone, consider giving a homemade item like cookies or jam or a soup mix, or give an experience, or even more precious, a gift of your time. You might offer to babysit for relatives or friends who would really appreciate an adult night out, or offer to help paint a room if you know someone who is remodeling, or promise to drive an elderly relative to visit friends, or teach someone who has always admired your sweaters how to knit. How about gardening help or a one-day use of your pickup to haul something? You can write out your promise and put it in a nice card with a bow on it.
If you’re not crafty or a great cook and you don’t have extra time to offer or possessions to lend, you might give a gift certificate for a local restaurant or movie theatre or bowling alley or theme park. Or if you are wealthy, give a whole weekend getaway to someone who really needs it. You can give the gift of a future event or holiday; the gifts don’t need to be immediate. We all need things to look forward to.
Gifts of your time, your creative skills, or an enjoyable experience are typically a lot more meaningful and useful than another piece of “stuff.” Focus on making memories instead of more credit card bills.
Most of us have way too much “stuff.” But nobody ever has too many happy memories. Happy Holidays!
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