The Perfect Murder Weapon

by Janis Patterson

We all believe that killing someone is easy as pie (remember, I’m speaking of in pixels only here) but it’s not as simple as it seems. The main trick is doing the deed and getting away with it. I mean, letting your character get away with it. Harder still is to make it so your sleuth can find enough clues to solve the mystery without making your killer seem like an idiot or your sleuth some sort of psychic/savant. What’s really hard is when your villain is so smart you really have to work to make it possible for your sleuth to catch him. I’ve had that problem in my current WIP, so I know whereof I speak!

One of the main things to catching a killer is the murder weapon. Guns and knives have traditionally been regarded as men’s weapons of choice, while poison is regarded as a more of a woman’s weapon, the rationale being that women are dainty little creatures of great sensibility who don’t like to see blood and gore. Really? And they kill people? Give me a break.

One of the main choices of murder weapon is dependent on its availability and traceability. A gun? Who owns it and how did the murderer get it? With the forensic ballistics available today – not to mention the creeping cancer of the gun control nuts – it’s harder and harder to make it believable that a villain can just grab a gun, shoot someone and get away with it. Of course, there are workarounds. The gun could be stolen. The gun could be bought on the black market. The gun could be ‘borrowed’ with the intent of framing the legitimate owner. Something else to be considered is that so much information needed to catch the villain – ballistics, registration, etc – is not available to an amateur sleuth unless they can wheedle it out of a policeman.

Forensics today can trace a knife down to the minutest measurement and shape and, if it is unusual enough, to the brand and store from which it came. If I were going to commit a murder with a knife, I’d go to the local Target or WalMart and buy the commonest knife I could, then afterwards boil it in bleach to kill any blood on it and donate it to some charity or other or leave it in a batch of kitchen utensils at a garage sale – after carefully wiping off all fingerprints. Of course, this is assuming the killer is strong enough both internally and externally to handle the strength necessary and the resultant blood, which is going to get all over his clothes. If you want to see how hard it is to stab someone, take your murder knife and stab a big, thick roast. It’s hard to get a knife deep enough to cause a fatal wound, but not as hard as stabbing a real life person, because the roast isn’t fighting you back!

Then there’s poison. First of all, where does the killer get it? Today so many of our commonly available compounds have had their poisonous elements removed or neutered. There’s nicotine, of course, sold for e-cigarettes, and it’s commonly available, but how do you know how much to use, and then there’s the problem of getting it into your victim. Same with prescription meds, which are generally fairly traceable because of limited availability. There are also the plant based poisons, but first you have to know about them, and again think of how much to use for a fatal does and how you’re going to get the resultant product into your victim Unfortunately for the killer plant based poisons are notorious for being both variable and unreliable. Poison contents vary according to the plant, the location where it was grown, the season of the year – and the phase of the moon for all I know. You never really know if you’ve gauged your dosage correctly until your victim either dies or survives. Also, this is considered rather esoteric knowledge, known to a smallish group of people (other than mystery writers) and fairly easily traceable.

For the hardy, there is always the staple of your two hands and a good old fashioned strangling. Of course, you have to know the victim well enough to get that close to him, and you have to be strong, for he will be fighting you. Strangling takes a great deal of strength as well, which basically rules out the delicately built person strangling a larger one. It also is harder than it seems. Life is tenacious, and it takes at least four minutes if not longer to strangle a person until death is assured, no matter how easy and quick it seems on television. Same objections with smothering. Unless the victim is unconscious your villain will both have to subdue and smother. Not easy.

So – is there a perfect murder weapon? Not that I know of. Every one has plusses and minuses, and in its way that is perfect for the mystery writer. You can choose one that fits your villain and your victim, but each method has built-in clues and difficulties that can, with a little accuracy and lots of creativity on your part, make it possible for your sleuth to capture your killer, no matter how smart that villain thinks himself to be.

Also, if you’d like to read the article The American Research Center in Egypt did on me and my upcoming novel A KILLING AT EL KAB, here’s the link – http://www.arce.org/news/u162

Why We Kill

by Janis Patterson

It is not, as some of my friends have said, because I am an old grump who wants to do away with everyone who annoys me. Not all the time, at least.

That said, however, taking someone whom you dislike intensely, who has been egregiously rude/cruel/unmannerly/whatever, and offing them can be very relaxing and therapeutic. (Of course, I’m talking about killing only in pixels.) It’s cheaper than therapy, can be done multiple times if the first time is not satisfying enough and no one gets really hurt. And, if you’re lucky, you can make a little money.

But why do people want to read about people being killed? After all, killing is messy. It’s permanent. And it’s very very illegal. I think the reasons are as varied as the readers. And the writers. Sublimation. Wish fulfillment. Excitement. The thrill of the chase. All basic human emotions, but I think the main reason is that in a mystery novel we want the assurance that all will turn out right – the murderer will be caught and properly punished. Balance in the world is restored. Justice is served.

I believe every rational person has a deep sense of justice. A lot of times the murder is committed because in some possibly twisted way it fulfills the murderer’s sense of justice – as incomprehensible as it might be to anyone else.

When we write or read mysteries we are not only indulging in escapism, we are shoring up the foundations of justice. The crime is solved. Balance returns. Our inner world is stable once more, even if the real world is far less simple or predictable.

Which means that we as writers are fortunate. I mean, how many people can say that we not only entertain, but we contribute to the happiness and mental health of the world? And all by killing people…

Clues, Clues Everywhere, or The Truth Hiding in Plain Sight

by Janis Patterson

What is a clue? I can hear all of you now saying “Duh! A clue is something the sleuth notices that helps solve the crime.”

Okay, that’s right – as far as it goes. The problem is, how do we make a series of clues that will help solve the crime that is neither so blatant that the story is over on page 19 or is so esoteric that the reader doesn’t understand it even after the crime has been solved and the clues explained?

I remember reading an Ellery Queen mystery (sorry I don’t remember the title – I was only seven or so) where the deciding clue was based on a particular letter of the Phoenician alphabet. The murder was cleverly done, as I recall, but the idea that both the killer and the sleuth (Mr. Queen) would be in the same rather mundane place at the same time and both know the Phoenician alphabet so jarred on my infant sensibilities that I remember it to this day. As I recall the setting was a house party at a rich man’s mansion, but I might be wrong about that.

Adding in clues is sort of like adding garlic to a casserole; too little and it is flat and uninteresting, but too many and it is unappetizing or perhaps even unswallowable.

In my opinion, the best clues are the ones that grow out of the characters and the storyline in an almost organic process. The truly best clues are the ones that sometimes even you don’t know are there.

An example. Years ago, when I was writing my first Janis Patterson mystery THE HOLLOW HOUSE I knew from the beginning who the murderer was going to be, but as I am a pantser, not much else. The story was ticking along quite well until about five chapters from the end, when I suddenly realized that my pre-determined murderer could not have done it. I floundered around for a while, then all of a sudden ‘Wow! Of course! So-and-so did it.’ And I wrote on, for another half chapter or so before once again it came to me that my new murderer couldn’t have done it. Truth is, from that first realization to the climax I changed the murderer some five times. Finally, as I was desperately trying to decide who did it, I suddenly realized who it was – someone I had never considered.

I don’t know why I had never considered this person, but it was perfect. The only bad thing was I knew I’d have to go back through the whole book and put in clues pointing to this person. Sigh. However… when I did start through the book, the clues implicating this person were all there already. I think I added two.

So – clues not only have to be there, they have to be subtle. How did I do it? I don’t know. The creation of a book, in case you hadn’t noticed, is very much akin to magic.

One way, I believe, was put forward by some famous mystery writer years ago – sorry, but I don’t remember which one. He said that the best way was to make everyone capable of being the murderer, then exonerate them one by one, just like your sleuth. I know there are those mystery writers who pre-plot every clue, and there are some who do it very well. Joy go with them. I can’t do that – I would be so bored that the book would never be written. I guess I have to be as much of a sleuth uncovering the truth as my detective.

Commercial : For those of you in the Denver area and those of you going there to attend the Historical Novel Society conference, I will be there both at the booksigning and presenting a paper on Egyptology and Elizabeth Peters. Ms. Peters (aka Barbara Michaels and Dr. Barbara Mertz) was an incredible author and a friend. She is very much missed.

Hello! by Janis Patterson

I’m so glaJanis Susan - color (1)d to see you here – this new group blog is so exciting and I am so honored to be a part of it. Now – we have been asked to use our first post as an introduction, so here we go – which sort of terrifies me, since I’m really rather a boring person.

I’m a seventh generation Texan who grew up in a wordsmithing family – primarily advertising and newspapers. I sold my first novel (to the old Dell Candlelight series) in 1979. In 1980 I was one of the original 40 or so women who met to see if an organization of romance writers was feasible – an organization that was later officially named RWA. I’m still a founder/charter member. Currently I’m also a member of The Author’s Guild, NINC, Sisters in Crime and MWA (where I help run the local chapter and sit on the SW regional board.) I also belong to several individual RWA chapters.

ExerciseIsMurder Front CoverI bore very easily, so I write in a lot of different genres – as Janis Susan May I write romance, horror and a couple of other things. As Janis Susan Patterson I write for children. As JSM Patterson I do scholarly and non-fiction work. As Janis Patterson I write cozy mysteries. And there are three very good reasons I use Janis Patterson for mysteries – first, I wanted a definite brand, something that was different from my other names. Second, it is my legal married name, and using it honors my wonderful husband, who supports me in every way possible. Third, with any luck at all it will get me shelved next to James Patterson!

I married for the first time very late in life – 54 – after a life of very varied experiences. My MAMW WEB PROMO mediumhusband is the most wonderful man in the world and I am so blessed to have him. Incidentally, he is also a number of years younger than I. Before we married I did a lot of things – among them talent agent for film and tv, editor in chief of two multi-magazine publishing groups, singer, document checker in a cruise agency, comparative analyst for a real estate firm specializing in apartment complex sales, Supervisor of Accessioning for a bio-genetic DNA testing lab… I did tell you I bored easily, didn’t I?

One thing that is never boring is my fascination with Ancient Egypt. I was one of 8 who PC WEB mediumfounded the North Texas Chapter of the American Research Center in Egypt (a scholarly support organization almost 70 years old) which is arguably the largest chapter in the country. I also founded, published and edited the Newsletter (now retitled Menhedj) which for the 9 years of my reign (word chosen deliberately) was the only monthly publication for ARCE in the world. From the second year it was archived as a scholarly publication in museums and universities around the country.

My husband and I met in that chapter, and several years later he proposed in the moonlit garden of the Mena Hotel in Giza, which sits across the road from the Pyramids. Yes, those Pyramids. We were married 6 months later and have lived happily ever after. We have been back to Egypt several times since, our most recent trip being just two months ago. To aid in researching a new book we were invited to stay at a dig house and have complete access to an entire archaeological dig – and believe me, civilians are NEVER invited to stay at dig houses. It was one of the most wonderful times of my life.

After leaving the dig house, we rented a flat in Luxor for a little relaxing vacation time – TEF WEB mediumwell, The Husband vacationed. I worked every day. Sometimes a lot and sometimes just a little while, but I never missed a day. I am going to buy a tablet though; hiking my 17 inch laptop to Egypt and back nearly killed me. Our flat faced the Gurnah Hills (where the Valley of the Kings is) and every morning I would get up early, fix a good cup of tea and sit on the balcony to watch the light from the rising sun dribble down the rough rock hills while the morning’s flight of tourist hot air balloons rose. Sigh. I really didn’t want to come back.

But – writing on the new book brings Egypt back to me. It is a straightforward mystery called A KILLING AT EL KAB, and is about the murder of a really unpleasant archaeologist and a missing treasure. I’m about a third in and it should be ready for release in late fall.

One more thing – they asked that we send a ‘mysterious’ picture of ourselves for the blog. I only have the one picture, so I sent it, but it is very mysterious. I think so, at least – it is a mystery that it makes me look so good. I really don’t look much like that!

Anyway, that’s about all there is I can think of. I’m so glad you’re here, and on my next rotation I promise to talk about something truly writerly. See you then –