Everyone’s a Killer

By JL Simpson

IMG_1610A bit of a dramatic title. Of course it’s not true but you’d never guess it if you were currently living at my house. Nervous Ninnies have taken over the building.

As if life isn’t complicated enough we decided to flog our house and move to Cairns in the tropical part of Australia, 5 days drive away. (I’m excited, my mop of hair not so much)

Anyway, before you move such a huge distance it’s important to downsize as much as possible to minimize the cost of the removal. This would be simple for most people but I live with a hoarder. Mr S loves to keep stuff, ‘that might be useful one day’. So, having convinced him to part with some of his treasure trove, we advertised the items online.

Aussies have a website called Gumtree where you can buy and sell stuff and it is full of interesting people. You advertise something for $100 and someone will offer you $20 and want it delivered. The percentage of lowballers and oddballs is very high so you do need to be careful and keep your wits about you or you get ripped off. However, it could be worse than selling something for half of what it’s worth. Some people online are not what they appear to be. (Shocking revelation, I know!) After a week of emails, texts and calls from lots of people who appear to have no social skills at all Mr S got really spooked. It didn’t help that our neighbor told him a horror story about someone spraying graffiti on their house after they refused to sell something. Now he won’t give out our address. Instead he meets people in public places or in other streets.

He is worried about them coming back and doing bad things to us if they are not happy with their purchases. However, in his quest to protect us all he is in danger of making himself look very guilty.The whole thing reminds me of an adventure I had years ago where I sold a car and the man who bought it could only meet me at 2 Am in the main street of a small town. I drove up and parked. Mr S parked next to me. I got out and the purchaser gave me a wad of dollar bills, I handed over the keys. I sped off with Mr S in his car. The purchaser drove the car he’d bought off me in the opposite direction, closely followed by the friend who had driven him to the hand over point. Talk about things looking dodgy, even more so when you know the town had a reputation for drug deals.

Anyway, so what is with the title? I do wonder if being a mystery author, or being married to a mystery author, makes you see crimes and potential crimes where none exist.

Tell me, do mystery readers have the same problem?

www.jlsimpson.com

 

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4 Responses to Everyone’s a Killer

  1. I can identify with the “problem,” yes. But, gosh, it’s also an opportunity! No end of possible scenarios for murder. Still, I hope your move is uneventful enough that you stay sane and healthy.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. marilynm says:

    Oh, my yes, writers have huge imaginations–but in reality, we all need to be cautions. I can’t even imagine moving, My husband is a hoarder too–has a shop full of stuff that he “might need some day”, and office that is piled high, and a table by his chair in the living room that i periodically sneak ads etc off to the trash. When we die, the grandkids who live with us will have to get one of those huge trash bins to haul off the junk.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. ambfoxx says:

    That car selling experience has mystery plot potential. And the vengeful dissatisfied buyers, too.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. patyjag says:

    I agree, we mystery writers can find a crime with everything we see and do. LOL Good luck with the move!

    Like

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